Today’s post comes to you written by J.D. Frailey, FranklinCovey Consultant. Take a moment to read this post and examine yourself and your team afterwards. What kinds of questions are you formulating together to drive your business forward? Enjoy!
“Why can’t I find time to do things before the deadline?”
“Why can’t I stick to an exercise program?”
“Why can’t I get people to communicate with each other?”
If you’ve ever asked yourself questions like these—and who hasn’t—it was probably in frustration, maybe even with hands thrown up, awash in a feeling of anger or helplessness.
But here is something to consider: maybe the questions themselves are the problem, specifically the way you’ve worded them.
You see, the human brain is excellent at answering questions and solving problems, that’s what it does. So—be really careful as to how you word the questions you ask yourself, because your brain will do its best to answer those questions, and the answers will either help you solve problems and move forward—or create more problems and hold you back.
Every answer to a question that begin with “Why can’t I—?“ is an OBSTACLE to what you want, a reason why you CAN’T, whether those answers are logical or even true.
“Why can’t I find time to do things before the deadline?” Because I’m too busy, because I’m a procrastinator, because I watch too much television, etc., etc.
“Why can’t I stick to an exercise program?” Because I don’t have time, because I hate to exercise, because I’m lazy, etc., etc.
Why can’t I get people to communicate with each other?” Because they’re lazy, because they don’t get it, because they want me to do everything for them, etc., etc.
The result? We are frustrated and we don’t get the results we want.
But what if you worded those same questions such that the answers are solutions rather than obstacles?
“How can I find time to do things before the deadline?” As taught in The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People or the FranklinCovey goal setting process: Start early, allot a bit of time each day, block out distractions while I work on the project, etc.
“How can I stick to an exercise program?” As recommended in The 5 Choices to Extraordinary Productivity: Work out with a partner, plan and schedule my exercise time in advance, set specific goals and record my progress, remind myself of the benefits of good health, etc.
Here is an example. I once worked with a client, a sales manager, who was frustrated that his team was convinced they could not meet a sales goal imposed by corporate, and therefore, he felt, were not really trying. After sharing the power of positive questions with him, he called his team together in a conference room. He titled a flipchart, “Why can’t we reach the sales quota goal?” He said to his team, “I know you feel strongly that the goal is unrealistic, unreachable, and I need to clearly understand why you feel this way, I need to understand what the obstacles are. So let’s hear them, and don’t hold back.”
His team mistakenly felt they had convinced him the goal was unreachable, that he had come to them for ammunition so he could push back on corporate, and they really opened up.
“It’s the economy!” “Look at what the competition is offering!” “We have too many other priorities!” And on and on.
He recorded every obstacle on the flip chart page, and after about five minutes the page was nearly filled. “Is there anything else?” When he was sure there were no more obstacles, he tore the page from the flip chart stand and turned to his team. “Follow me,” he said.
Confused, they followed him outside and to a far corner of the parking lot. Without a word, he wadded up the flipchart sheet, got a lighter from his pocket, and held the flame to the paper. When it had ignited he dropped it to the asphalt and stood with his team watching until it had extinguished itself.
He turned to face his team. “Now let’s be clear,” he said in a quiet voice. “We are going to reach the goal, and we are going to do it the right way, period. I have tremendous confidence in you, and in our ability as a group to get creative and to work hard and to make that number. We’re going back in that room, and I don’t want to hear one more word about why we can’t. We are only going to focus on how we can. And as a group we ARE going to get there. Come with me.”
They followed him back into the building and into the conference room, obviously down and disheartened. They watched as he headed a clean flipchart sheet, “How can we reach the sales quota goal?”
“All right,” he said, marker in hand. “Let’s hear your ideas. I know it will be a challenge, but how can we get there?”
After a silence that had begun to stretch to an uncomfortable length, one of the sales reps finally spoke up. “Well, there is one thing I’ve begun doing that has gotten me some really good appointments. What I do is…”
“Great idea,” the manager said, and wrote it down. “What else?”
After a shorter silence, another team member raised her hand and shared an idea regarding benefits comparisons. The manager wrote this idea down, then turned around to see two more hands raised to share ideas. After ten minutes the flipchart was nearly filled with over a dozen ideas for increasing sales.
Any guesses on what ultimately happened? The team exceeded the “impossible” goal by over five percent.
If you really want to reach a difficult goal or solve a tough problem, and you find yourself stuck, be sure to ask questions that provide answers, not obstacles, and you greatly increase your odds of success.
J.D. Frailey, FranklinCovey Consultant
Copyright © 2012 - J.D. Frailey
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We hope that you found today’s post thought provoking about your paradigms as a leader and the culture of your team. If you would like to visit with us to discuss enabling your culture to achieve new and better results, let’s talk!
Enabling greatness one organization at a time,
John Vakidis
Associate Client Partner | FranklinCovey
